school.carnival fun

we went to Rylans school.carnaval tonight ...what a fun time and break from stress and my heart being sad and broken for the past week or more ..I have decieded that I am going to make the best life I can like I have always done and focus on us ...no more wondering or worrying about what others want or expect from me ...I.just can't go on like that...I am.putting on my big girl panties and moveing on with my life ...if people add to my happiness then yay great but if they don't then so be it ...I will be 45 this year ... nobody is ever gaurenteed any tomarrows so I need to focus on these moments with my little boy., I want him to see all the fun things we can do together I want him to have a good solid foundation in these formative years and Randy wants that for him too...are we perfect parents? no but our children know that they come first and for the past couple of years I havnt been able to do to much fun stuff... between sickness,surgerys and recoveries and taking care of my grandma ...since she died in what is rylans bedroom he won't sleep in there so I think I will start sleeping in there with him to see if its ever going to happen we may have to do some rearranging so he has a bed (well he has a bed a really nice bunk but will have no part of sleeping alone in it....the toddler bed is just about to small for him and when he sleep with us we don't get any sleep he is like a fish out of water flip flopping all over the place...
    Now about my worms they have been bedding down in the office for the past few days its just been too cold to put them outside ...I have big dreams for my little wiggly friends can't wait to get pics of our plants this summer to share with you...